Accreditation

I went in for my 6-month CT scan today. My favorite radiation tech, K, came skipping out to the lobby and said they had just found out today that they did get their accreditation that I helped with. I told her I was excited to go home and blog about it again, summarizing the first blog. She just laughed.

Thankfully, today I did not have to drink extra barium or a bottle of water. The scan was easy and noneventful. We'll have results next Thursday.

My 30th Ball anniversary reception was really nice. I saw many people I hadn't seen for awhile. Michael drove in, our CEO made a showing and spoke, my sisters sent flowers, and lots of people came. It was fun.

Today I am hanging out and doing stuff around the house.

Pleurisy...

...is swelling (inflammation) of the thin layers of tissue (pleura) covering the lungs and the chest wall. The outer layer of the pleura lines the inside of the chest wall, and the inner layer covers the lungs. The tiny space between the two layers is called the pleural cavity. This cavity normally contains a small amount of lubricating fluid that allows the two layers to slide over each other when you breathe. When the pleura becomes inflamed, the layers rub together, causing chest pain. This is known as pleuritic pain.

So, after an afternoon of chest x-ray, bloodwork, and physical exam, they think I have pleurisy. The x-ray showed no gigantic growths in the lungs (thank goodness, more info after the CT scan on Thurs), I've had no fever, and my symptoms pretty much link up with the diagnosis.

Treatment? Time and pain-killing drugs. Percocet--the good stuff. Also, my blood is a little on the thin side, so we're reducing my dosage of coumadin. So, unless I start coughing up blood or getting out of breath, I just need to go easy, and take my pain drug when I can afford to be loopy. Though as things go, I feel more loopy all the time thanks to chemo brain.

I'm looking forward to the celebration on Wed of my 30 years at Ball. Hopefully the pleurisy will not get any worse. I can live with it as it is for now. Just get me through the next two weeks.

Rough Weekend

It's been a rough weekend after the last treatment. Even with the lowered dose and the ProCrit shot, Friday/Sat I was feeling REALLY crappy. My chest wall hurt when I breathed. Lying down was hard. Been sitting up as much as possible. It's a little better today. Hard to describe how it feels. Kind of like I just ran a 400-yard dash as fast as I could, and now my lungs/chest are burning. Not having any trouble breathing. Hoping maybe it's just muscular.

Michael's 24-hr intestinal flu has exceeded its time limit. If not better tomorrow, he may have to see a Dr. Nothing really got done around the house, since neither one of us has felt up to it. Since this was a non-dog-show weekend I was planning to use the time wisely. So much for trying to plan. I should know better by now.

My scan is scheduled for Thursday. I have my grape barium smoothie waiting for me in the fridge. Hopefully I'll keep feeling better as the days go on.

The weather has been awesome. I sit out on the front porch and read. Would like to feel up to some yard work. Hopefully soon.

Half of a Treatment

Today is R6D15. My counts were very low. They almost didn't treat me again. But, gave me a 50% dose reduction of my already-reduced dosage. Also got a shot to boost my red blood cells.

Next week I will have a scan, and the following week start round 7 and get the results. The Dr. may want to start doing 2 weeks on, 1 week off. Maybe I'll tolerate that better.

We had a dog show last weekend. No points for Kohlbi, but he showed well. Weekend after this is Cheyenne and then the following weekend is our local Samoyed specialty on Friday and an all-breed dog show on Sat/Sun. Whew!

Michael and I are planning to go to the Samoyed National in Topeka, KS at the end of September. Then we will turn around and go to Florida for the launch of the shuttle for Hubble Servicing Mission #4. Ball Aerospace has a huge part in this mission. I had always wanted to go to one so asked to be put on the list. I was lucky enough to get an invitation. Should be exciting. After that, we stay home for awhile.

I'm going to try not to spend a lot of energy over the next two weeks worrying about the scan. I can't change whatever it will be. It's always an anxious time, though. I'll keep busy and not dwell on it.

I hope I can do that.

Self-Absorbed

I feel like I'm being very self-absorbed lately. I know I'm not reaching out to others as much. It's not because I don't care, some days it's a matter of energy. If you send me email, I swear that I read it (probably that day) even if I don't respond. I feel like I'm not being a good friend.

I had one friend who was going through something and didn't say anything because they didn't want to add to my burden. No one is doing that. I'm still the same person (albeit a bit more tired) and I still care about what is going on in your lives--good or bad. I hope I'm not so self-absorbed that I can't celebrate the good times and listen or help during the bad times.

I know I'm not the poster child for being a great friend right now. I just want everyone to know that I do care and I'm doing my best to balance everything. Hang in there with me.

Chemo Brain

Yes, that's right. That's what you can get after awhile.

I didn't have a great week after R6D1. I had a couple of fevers, felt tired and weak, didn't have much appetite, and lost 5 lb. No one compliments you on your weight loss when you have cancer. Not that they should be. You want to hold onto your reserves as long as possible. I'm down ~30 lb. Thankfully I had some reserves.

Treatment today was OK. I asked the Dr. about cognitive issues. The other day I wrote out my full name and mispelled my middle name, Frances, with an i instead of an e. I was horrified. The Dr. laughed and I laughed as well. It was pretty funny, yet also concerning. Then he brought up the term 'chemo brain'. I've also noticed that I don't remember things very well and that I don't type as well anymore.

My hands/fingers shake a bit now. I'll be curious to have my MRI/neurology appt in Sept to see if my MS is progressing or if this is all due to PC/chemo.

We discussed my CA19-9 at the visit today. We are still going to wait to get a scan until after the next treatment. It could just be one tumor growing with nothing else moving. We will just have to wait and find out.

Michael and I had a 'talk and cry' night on Tuesday. We do have to confront our fears and it helps enhance our communication as we process things very differently from each other. I only got a couple of hours of sleep (it was too late to take an Ambien and get up for work). But, I slept good last night.

Hopefully my chemo brain is actually caused by chemo and nothing in my brain. There is always that chance. There is a chance that anything can happen. I can just muddle through it and try to keep a semi-intelligent wit about me.

Let me know how I'm doing.

Round 6, Day 2

Yesterday I started round 6 of chemo. He knocked my dose down just a little again, so I can hopefully get through all three treatments in this round. I actually feel pretty good. We will do a scan after this round to see how things are going.

Today, the Dr. office called to tell me my CA19-9 has gone from the 100s into the 900s. Obviously something is growing somewhere. We won't know exactly what is going on until the scan in a couple of weeks. That magic number is not the be-all, end-all, but it can be indicative of activity.

I'm a bit worried now and anxious to get the scan. We'll talk to the Dr. about it at our next appointment on Thursday. In the meantime, I will find things to keep me busy. Today I spent about 1.5 hours weeding along the driveway and some of the flower beds. We have a dog rescue picnic tomorrow and some dog shows coming up. Hopefully the time will go quickly.

Haircut

I've been debating about it since I got the wig and started wearing hats. I've never had really short hair in my entire adult life. You would think at this point, it wouldn't really matter, but somehow it did.

I didn't have the guts to get it shaved completely. One of my sisters said that after giving it quite a bit of thought, she decided she would not shave her head in solidarity should I choose to go that route. I thought that was really nice of her to even consider it.

Today I went and got it cut short. It actually looks like I have more hair with it shorter. Not that I'd go out in public with my almost-naked pate. I figured it would make wearing the wig and hats easier, and not look so scraggly.

Today I ordered another wig and a couple of hats online, so I have some options. I can no longer be in denial about what 'thinning' hair means. So, I'll try to be a bit stylish to compensate.

Back Home

We got home yesterday late afternoon. Our housesitter had given us a heads up that the air conditioner wasn't working properly since Friday night. Bummer.

We had a great visit with Mom. She wanted us to go through her stuff and pick what we wanted. We shipped several boxes of little things home. The bigger stuff is identified and we will get that when she decides to move from the farm.

One of Maurice's sons is clearing the junk off the land. He's been wanting to do it for years, but Maurice wouldn't let him. He has moved four junked cars, the top of the old silo and lots of other iron scrap. It looks better already.

We got the chance to see lots of Rellertives while we were there. We have such a good time with them. I haven't laughed so much in a long time. Yesterday, we had brunch with my maternal cousins in Minneapolis on our way to the airrport. It was great to be able to see both sides of the family.

I felt pretty good all week, just tired. The hair is coming out fast and furious. I've learned how to hug tall people and keep my hat on at the same time. Not as easy as you might think.

The weather was pretty mild--not too hot and not too humid. We did have a good storm early one morning that I slept through and that had Mom and Sister #3, who was staying at her house, in the basement for awhile. The rest of us were at a hotel in town.

We had a fun week full of laughter and some tears. I know my mother has some difficult days ahead off and on. But, she is a trouper. It is good to visit, but it's also good to get home (except for that darn air conditioning).